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To the husbands pretending we’re pretty¬†

I have been with my husband for 9 years so it’s pretty safe to say I do not look like I once did. I had sun kissed skin from the endless amount of money I spent at the tanning salon. My hair was always done because of the amount of time I had ro myself every morning before class. My outfits were on point because my Express jeans for $49.99 were a good price compared to the other name brand stores. 

Fast forward 9 years we have two children that my once size 2 body carried. We have mornings that begin as early as 4am and nights that are so hit or miss depending on the mood of our kids. We have clothes with stains and colors that are faded so our children can have a new wardrobe every season. We have days with no time to shower and mornings we rely completed on coffee and my eye cream to hide the puffiness. 

If you look at any of my social media pages they went from date night photos with every cute outfit I owned to pictures of you and the kids. I hide my Face and body in every photo taken. If it wasn’t for me posting them people wouldn’t even know I exist. 

But you, you pretend I’m still that girl 9 years ago. You send me country music lyrics like “good morning beautiful” when I know my face is not beautiful as I lay fast asleep, mouth open, while you get ready for work. 

You come home with that flirtatious attitude, holding my hips like you did when I was itty bitty. Winking at my as I get dressed in my super comfy high rise mom jeans like I’m wearing painted on low rise skinnies from express for $49.99.

I love you for pretending. I love you for seeing right through everything and remembering me as I once was. I love you for not judging and simply embracing every part of who I am now as a mother and wife. I love you for loving me in this way as I’m still struggling with who I am. 

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The Meltdown

Okay let’s talk about what you don’t want to share with new moms… The down and dirty… The meltdowns, and no I’m not talking about the kids.

Yes we as parents have them and lately mine have been on FULL FORCE!! The past month my oldest has only wanted me for bedtime. I’m only allowed to get him out of the tubby and dressed. I am only allowed to rub his back. Every Friday night he wants a movie and cuddle. It all sounds insanely adorable until you have 50 million other things to do and your children are boycotting your husband! 

What did I do? No one likes me in this house?

My poor husband thinks he is the black sheep of the family. He asks me regularly “what did I do? No one likes me in this house?” My response to him is, “the kids are in a phase, don’t worry it will end.” What I’m thinking in my head… “YOU SHOULD BE SO LUCKY!” They’re driving me crazy! 

Anyone else having these days?! I feel like I need to find the nearest Target and camp out. Instead I sit here rocking my baby, eating chicken wing dip and feeling entirely impressed with my multi tasking skills.